Dear Mystic Ali :Why do I always make things harder than they need to be?

Dear Mystic Ali ,

Why do I always make things harder than they need to be?

Even when things are going well, I find myself spinning in overthinking, creating drama, or choosing the most complicated path. It’s like I don’t know how to rest in peace or let things be simple. I sabotage ease. I exhaust myself. I know I have PTSD — and sometimes I wonder if I’m addicted to the chaos because it feels safer than stillness.

How do I stop making everything so hard?

— Tired of the Complications

Dear Tired,

This is such a tender truth, and you are not alone.

When someone has lived through trauma, the nervous system becomes wired for survival — not ease. Simplicity can feel foreign, even threatening, because your body learned to scan for danger, anticipate disruption, and prepare for disappointment at all times. Complication becomes a familiar companion — not because you want chaos, but because your system was trained to expect it.

You are not broken. You are brilliant — your mind and body found a way to stay alive in the midst of pain. But now, as you heal, that old brilliance can become a burden. It turns into overplanning, overexplaining, overcompensating. It convinces you that peace is suspicious. That joy is irresponsible. That ease is naïve.

But here’s the truth: Ease is not the enemy. It’s the medicine.
You are not lazy for craving rest. You are not unworthy of simple love. You are simply recalibrating from a life of vigilance to a life of trust.

The work now is to let your nervous system practice safety in the simple.
To remind yourself that you no longer need to earn your existence through effort or chaos.

You don’t need to complicate things to prove your strength.
You are already powerful in your presence.
You are worthy of a life that flows.

It’s okay to be learning how to receive it.

With grace and grounding,
Mystic Ali

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